“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it."

Monday, February 25, 2013

So Close...Yet So Far Away

The dreaded time has come, and not for the first time.

I'm stuck aka:
No...this isn't the first post I've done about writer's block...but this time sucks most of all. You want to know why? Because I'm THIS close to the end of my first draft. I was weird and when I wrote my novel, I skipped around. I did the scenes that were screaming to be placed on paper. It's the in between scenes, the more "blah" scenes that don't leave a huge imprint on your mind, but still need to be there to help make sense to the flow of the story scenes. If that makes any sense whatsoever. It's not that I'm writing the wrong stuff; it's that I can't write it at all. I sit there...and imagine what I could say and it just disappears and I think of everything and anything else besides what I should be writing. 
I'm so close to the end. Maybe that is whats going on here. It's like my mind knows that and I want to move to the editing process to make it better and put in all the big words and just clean it up. I want to find that critique group and start moving along. But I can't. Not until the first draft is complete.

So if my drive is that strong...why can't I do it? Why do I partially want to give up. That's a terrible thought and I want to get rid of it instantly...but it's there. Lurking like a poisonous drug.
 I want the voices (yes my character's voices) to come back to me. I miss them. At the beginning they were screaming at me. To the point where I couldn't stop writing, and I didn't. I haven't had too bad of writer's blog until now. Maybe because once I realized I was editing instead of just writing (even awful things that I hope leave the story during the revising process) I let go of that and just wrote. It didn't matter. But it matters now. It matters that I finish this.

I'm so close but I feel so far away. I can do this. I know I can. The writer's drive is unbelievable and I feel life if it's the real deal, nothing can stop it. I just have to get through the obstacles as of late. Hopefully it'll work out. Hopefully they'll come back to help out a bit.
Writers who have completed the first draft! What did you do to get done. How did you make it the extra last miles to the finish line. I know the journey is still so long, maybe that's whats holding me back. But how did you get it done? HELP! 

Thanks friends :) Happy Monday by the way. 

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Words of the Past

Thank you for those who commented on my last post! Some of you offered to become critique partners so to that I say lets keep in touch!

So it's Saturday morning and I'm cleaning my room when I stumble upon a large box under my bed. I'm not going to lie I had no idea what was inside. When I opened it, the things all but exploded out and it was all about ME.

All my old assignments growing up that I kept from school, old class pictures, letters, etc. The best part of it was seeing a binder with all the poems I made when I was in middle school and when I was in tenth grade (for assignments). I also found a little book I was writing. I was writing it in 3rd grade. The handwriting is so cute, and of course I'd appreciate that because I'm a teacher and I think the first handwriting of a child is so beautiful because their hand is developing (another story completely).
Book full of poems I wrote
My story from 3rd grade 
I opened this stuff and took a peek, and I really did get sentimental. If anyone in my life doubted that I loved to write at a small age, then look at this now pile sitting on my bed. I've loved to write since I was able to write. But it went even before then - I was a storyteller. I would gather the stuffed animals around me and tell them stories of castles, tree houses, catching fairies. My mom has a picture to prove it. I've always had such a while imagination. My cousin and I would play detectives in the backyard and write down our observations, or we would become mermaids in my swimming pool. If only we could keep that exact state-of-imagination through our journey of becoming adults...but then again, I sort of have. I think when we writing fantasy fiction, or any writing for that matter, we are reverting back to the 5 year olds we used to be. It's harder, yes of course it is, but it can be done. We have to let go of the ridicule we think we'll receive from adults. That's why I love working with my young students. They don't have any boundaries yet. They don't get embarrassed about how they act or look. They just look at the world in pure wonderment and awe. They help me look at the world in that way as well. So everyday with them is an adventure.

How old were you when you started writing or storytelling? It's a gift...truly it is! Please do share. I'm going to share a poem I wrote from 7th grade. It's not the best, but it makes me smile. Enjoy.
And this poem seems so appropriate now that it's a blizzard outside - literally in a matter of two minutes! WOW. Check out my Saturday morning on VINE. It consists of writing, blizzard, and of course drinking coffee out of my owl mug! 


Thursday, February 21, 2013

How to Find the Right Critique Partners

So I'm getting extremely close to the end of my first draft (took me long enough) and I'm thinking of the next steps in my writing journey. I understand that editing, more editing, and then even more editing is in the near future. However, I would like to have some help. My family and friends already said they'd help, but I want someone outside my box to help me edit.

Which is why I'm having this post. I've had one other critique partner in my past that I found online...it didn't go over well. I don't think she understood where I was coming from with the story I was editing at the time (unfinished project). I like when other writers are honest and blunt, but there's a difference in positive criticism and being down right rude. I was also scared and uneasy the whole time that this reader was going to take my ideas I had...do any of you ever feel that way?

I'm hoping through the blogging world I can meet someone I feel I can trust with my story. It's so important to me and just handing it over is scary...so I want it to be a right match. I would love to make good friends over it too! I've noticed that all the writers I've met, you all, are so nice and respectful; encouraging and supportive. I would love to make lifetime friendships. But I do need help. I would be a liar if I said I was wonderful at editing because I'm not and know I still have a lot to learn.

So here is open discussion time! Tell me about how you went about the editing process. How did you find critique partners or a Beta Reader? How did you trust them with your baby? I need advice!

I would love to start the process of finding people even though I still have a little bit more to finish up on my story. But why not start process is finding someone now?

For the record if you didn't look at my pages on Projects, my novel is going to be a series, most likely a trilogy or four books. It's YA Fantasy Fiction. It's in 3rd person voice and the main character is a boy. I'll obviously give more information to any partners I gain :)

Thanks writers! I appreciate it.

This last sentence I just updated on February 22nd, 2013. I have been researching a lot, and author Natalie Whipple posted a great discussion HERE on getting a critique partner for anyone who is interested.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Who I Am: A Moment

Yesterday before night school, I went to Barnes and Noble (one of my favorite places) and I sat there looking at all the books. A moment went through me where I felt unease. There were so many books, how could normal me get a book on that shelf one day? There are so many talented writers out there, what made me think I could be a part of that world? Feeling this empty feeling, I started to walk past the books not directly looking at any of them and then I looked over for some reason. It was the Harry Potter series. I stopped...dead in my tracks and smiled. This series started my love for reading. This series made me want to be a writer all those many years ago when I was in 6th grade. And in that moment I realized I should be on that shelf. I have a story to share. I've been telling stories since I was 5 years old. I'd call up my Nana and tell her a wild story. What a wonderful sport to sit there for two hours listening to my fiction storytelling. She told me tiring Christmas this year that those were her favorite memories of the two of us. She looked forward to the random calls and my story. I told her I wanted to be an a writer and I was writing something big. She said, "You have always been a writer and I've been waiting to read your books again." I had such a passion for it way back when and I realized that I am a writer. That's a huge part of who I am. And even though I won't be J.K. Rowling...she's one of a kind...I'll be someone. Someone that is hopefully remembered one day as being a wonderful writer and a wonderful teacher to children. I see my students who are 4 and 5. They cannot read quite yet, but they have the same passion for books as I always have had. I want to write for them, for me, for others around the world.

That's who I've always been. It's not that I'm just barely figuring this out. So sitting there at B&N, I get that overwhelming feeling of joy that pushes that feeling of unease out of the water. I see my beloved HP books and remember a quote J.K. once stated:
I want my stories to live in the hearts of many. I hope what I write inspires a child just like I was to follow their dreams as well.

Monday, February 18, 2013


I love having the day off! Thanks for President's Day, I do! And what have I been doing? Yes homework...but also a lot of writing.

You can see in my main title that I have 55,671 - what does that mean? That's what I just hit on my novel. It's actually coming to an end. OH MY GOODNESS! Sorry just went off to dance and scream.

I cannot believe after two years, it's finally coming to a close. In a way. I still need to do the lovely editing process. But I look at the milestone of completion of the first draft huge. There were so many points where I didn't know how I was going to take the story. I've seen it in my head for so long I just wanted it down on paper. At times, I really didn't know it could be done. But now, after having a lot of faith, determination, and hard work, I'm that much closer.

Who knows what will happen after it's all edited. I will go on the path I suppose of getting my draft edited and hopefully finding an agent. It seem so weird and I honestly have my fingers crossed.

I think you go through a moment like - it's just me...how can I get all that. But I've followed a lot of writer's blogs and a year ago they were just like me, now a lot of them are published authors. It can happen. No, I may not be the next J.K Rowling (I wish!), but I want my story out there. I truly do. I will work hard to get to that point even if it takes me ten more years!

Sometimes you just want your voice to be heard. That's exactly what I'm doing.

So here is to 55, 671 and the "almost" completion of my first draft.

Any tips on what to do next? Love hearing from you all! Thanks. Hope writing is going as well for you as it is me.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Going Back

So I've been really bad at writing lately. I know why. Trying to work on it, but life truly takes over. Last night u watched a video blog of myself almost a year and a half ago about the idea I had for my novel. Seeing my excitement made me feel that excitement for the story all over again. So I started writing again and couldn't stop. It's funny when something like that inspires you all over again. I don't know how authors keep at it...then again it becomes their full time job so that's understandable enough. But I cannot always write only when I find inspiration. I need to find the time.

I have been reading more (on a side note). The more you read, the better of a writer you will be. Stephen King stated that in his book On Writing.

I need to stick with it. I've begun to think of new ideas for children's books again too! I see my students and the excitement they have every time they book up a book and it makes me smile. I would love to create a book for them.

Life cannot cloud your dreams. Challenge you, maybe, but the dream should be in action and we should fight for it.